Heard this statement three times from different men “I would marry a woman who works at Walmart over masculine career woman!”
After some deep thinking realized why! FEMININITY!!!
The super power of a woman!
I notice something. I intentionally became softer to reflect and cultivate the fruits of the spirit. Naturally feminine radiance heighten. Owning femininity attracted masculine men who wanted to help and do nice things for me. Men went out their way to open doors for me. I’m talking about no where near the door men patiently wait for me to enter, carry my bags, let me walk first, friendly hello, and compliments from blue, black, yellow, brown, white, blue, young, and old men.
Some say power is the p**** but real power is femininity. Yes p**** will get you lust, sex, and materialistic stuff. But femininity will get you deeds, love, and the ring. Add fruits of the spirit now you have him whipped lol.
Are you in tune with femininity?
Qualities of a feminine woman….
- Flirt with eyes not body
- Fun to be around, positive vibes, easy going
- Correct people with love and compassion
- Humility, team player
- Sensitive, empathy
- Need to be cared for
- Friendly, approachable, inviting body language
- Self love, self care, confident
- Mystery & self-respect of leaving something to the imagination
- Loyal, clear about what you want
- Don’t play games, uplifting
- Tender voice, gentle touch, good manners
- Nurturing, generous, domestic
- Presence alone without saying a word commands the room
Bye -Bye to traditions that no longer serve us….
When we know better we do better. Generations before us did the best they could to nurture and teach us not to depend on men and/or let a man treat you wrong. Rightfully so because tracing back to slavery black families were destroyed and forced to separate. As a result, husbands had to leave their wives and kids to find work and vice versa. Forcing women to be the head of the household. Women had to be tough and endure hardships mainly because they were single parents, abused, neglected, and cheated on. Naturally strong and courageous women had to adapt to “ only the strong survive” mentality. As a result, women have unintentionally become masculine, tough, strong and hard, independent, and scorned to provide for their family. There comes a time when you have to let the past go in order to heal and learn from the past. Hear me out not condemning because have so much love, respect, and appreciation for previous generations for instilling strong, hustle, determination, drive, and independent values. I will teach my future daughters history and the same values. But with a twist. I believe each generation goal is to do better than the next to evolve. The time is now to teach strong yet soft, allow true love to grace us, prepare and wait for husband God has for us (no more rushing to marry wrong guy due to society pressures and limited thinking), and submit to a worthy man. The word submission is taboo but when you meet your equivalent there is nothing wrong or weak about submission!! I’m talking about a god-fearing man who lives according to the word, submits to Christ, honors, protects, provides, honest, faithful, builds with you, and leads you.
Ladies can I get an AMEN! AMEN! Come through Boaz!!
Myth about successful, strong, and independent women…
You are “cute, degreed, employed, and unbothered”. Toot your own horn because you are all that and a bag of chips. You take care of yourself, pay your own bills, dress the part, supportive, and encouraging. But does your independent vibe come off as you don’t need a man? I can do it all by myself attitude? Do what I want whenever I want can’t nobody tell me nothing? Do you refuse to submit to a man? A masculine man is NOT impressed solely on your independence, income, or college degree. Don’t faint! It’s true! A masculine man wants to provide and protect! Kings are not looking at your resume or what you can offer him when they decide if you are their wife. A King is not looking for his woman to provide for his family. What attracts a King is letting him be the masculine energy while you are the helpmate and feminine energy. He watches your wifey qualities like your heart and who you are not just your body, career, and accomplishments.
I remember going on a first date with a guy. He THANKED ME for allowing him to be the man and pay for my meal. I made more money than him but he appreciated the fact that I made him feel man enough to provide. Although, in my mind was thinking dude you just provided a free meal and good conversation THANK YOU. Lol slightly joking but for real for real.
Control your tongue…
Me and my big fat mouth have come a long way! Thank God for revealing the need to change, self-control, and shut up ministry!!! I’m the type of girl who speaks up to defend the helpless, stands up for what’s right regardless if popular or not, motivate, support, and cheer you on. But… sometimes can be plain blunt and mean with my words. Oh and please don’t cross me positive patty turns into patty from the block lol words cut like a knife you may or may not recover from traumatic stab wounds so yes words are life or death.
The power of word play when you learn the balance between being opinionated, speaking up, honest, living your truth but adding a dash of grace, love, and kindness. Now that’s sexy aka lady like (for the overly religious folks wink wink)
“ Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits”. – Proverbs 18: 21 (ESV)
Boast a man’s ego…
Hearing words like men are suppose to “suck it up”, “ man up”, and/or “take it like a man”. Didn’t think men had feelings or the need to stroke a man’s ego. Wasn’t until decided to put my all into becoming a wife started to pay attention to men feelings. Realized men are extremely sensitive. Even men who believe statements mentioned above and don’t express their feelings. Started to realize men fragile side that need to be cared for with gentleness. If not, overtime words can destroy and damage a man’s ego. Life can be so simple! Make him feel a like King. Just like women want to feel like a Queen.
Let’s face it “ a man ego is just as sensitive as a woman’s self esteem”.
Vulnerability is a turn on…
Imagine this. Damsel in distress works for a reason. Your knight and shining armor wants to save you from the cruel world. Be your superhero, protector, and show you chivalry still exists! In order to receive love have to be vulnerable and open. We attract who we are!
Being vulnerable about your feelings and allowing your man to express his feelings. As well as being a great listener who can understand a man’s perspective. A masculine man who can be himself around you without being critiqued, judged, ignored, or told he is weak for his softer side. Personally, I love a man in touch with his soft side and emotions. Ladies when a man opens up to you and exposes his true self it’s the most beautiful thing because means he trust you.
The beloved Iyanla Vanzant taught me “ don’t be forceful or controlling. Being in control is such a low level aim to be the woman in charge”. When you master this ideology allows a man/husband to lead you. Queens are in charge by the way she carries herself. Don’t have to demand, nag, make threats, control, or force a man or anyone else to do what you want or always have your way. After all, love is freedom. Freedom for people to make their own decisions and be who they are not who we want them to be.
A man’s PEACE not HELL..
Feminine women are NOT temperamental, don’t cuss, or fuss. Being mean, angry, unforgiving, holding onto the past, attitude all the time, get mad at small stuff, and talk down to men around people makes us less attractive. A masculine man is attracted to peace not hell on earth.“Be a King’s peace and watch how he runs to you. If you always create wars he will run from you”. The God in YOU attracts your masculine King. God is love! None of those traits are godly. Feminine women know how to create a happy and stress free environment.
True beauty of a woman….
Men are visual beings and physical attraction is important. Women can be beautiful, dress up, wear make up, get hair done, and take a million pictures. But a true Queen understands her beauty and treasure is found in her heart and spirit. The most beautiful thing is not your face or body it’s how we love and treat people. You can’t cover up an ugly and mean spirit. Character overrides outward beauty.
“ Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight”. – 1 Peter 3: 3 -4 (NIV)
We may not have it all together but the evolution of a woman is the ultimate femininity…. Own every bit of it.
HOPE YOU ARE ENCOURAGED!
Peace, Love, & Blessings!
XOXO Go Patty💋 😘
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Wow! nice blog on femininity. Every word is so true and hopefully encouraging for women who dont have answers. In my last relationship i use to be that woman who for say trying to the man and not let him lead. I have learned my lesson and became submissive. Nice work love it.
Thank you Paulette! My hope is to enlighten women who don’t have answers or guidance! Happy you learned submission and me too!!! We can sit back and let our men lead!! It feels good to not have to control everything and have a man take the lead!! Much Love!!